I called into the local supermarket after spending some time with a friend yesterday. It was almost 6.30pm and I decided to get some frozen chips to have with a lovely piece of fillet steak I’d left defrosting.
I hate grocery shopping but I’ve been about three times in the last week as my family (brother, sister-in-law and niece) are coming to stay with my mother over Easter and will almost certainly also spend some time with me. I’m such a bad shopper that I forget things each time I go (and yes, I use a list – sometimes) and am yet to remember cotton buds and cotton balls. *Sigh*
While shopping last night, however, I noticed that the Easter Egg supplies were still plentiful. Often – just a few days before Easter – the shelves look like some medieval village which has been raped and pillaged by vikings; but I was surprised to see them still relatively well stocked and orderly.
It occurred to me that I probably should buy something for my niece. At 16yrs of age, she is hardly an Easter Bunny devotee, but I thought some token gesture may be called for. But, as I had the Crunchie flavoured chocolate rabbit (her fave last year!) in my hand I paused.
Could I really trust myself to have the rabbit at my place for three days without eating it?
I wasn’t sure.
I don’t mean to imply that I don’t trust myself. Cos I mostly do. But… when it comes to my ‘trigger’ foods, I’m not so sure.
I had my (Skype) coaching session with Karen Anderson yesterday. “It’s been months since I binged,” I told her. I explained that I occasionally notice the thought (to buy corn chips or chocolate) enter my mind, but it’s quickly and effortlessly dismissed. “I don’t really need them,” I told her.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not being ridiculously healthy. (Of course… I mean, HELLO!?!?) In fact, if I’m at someone’s house and they offer me chocolate or corn chips, I’ll probably say yes. But… I will not buy it. At the moment anyway.
I like to think that – in time – I’ll be able to buy danger foods without it leading to the end of the free world (ie. I’ll again start buying copious amounts and bingeing on them) – but at the moment avoidance doesn’t make me feel deprived.
So, this will be the first Easter in my entire life that I’ve not planned on chocolate.
My mother may buy me something, but I’ll enjoy it with my family; not alone in front of the television. In secret.
And that folks, is progress.
Are you going to partake in some seasonal chocolate?