You know you’re getting old when….

Saturday, December 22, 2012 Permalink

Several years ago my BFF spent a night at the pub with other friends and – as girls friends d0 – she was regaling me with stories of their escapades the following day.

There was an interstate cricket match on at the time, and as the pub in question is near the cricket grounds, some of the cricketers and hanger-oners were at the pub. My friend – it eventuated – had been chatted up by the coach or assistant coach or a trainer or similar.

Even though it was at least five years ago I still remember my reaction to her tale. Because I was gobsmacked.

NOT that someone chatted her up. And NOT that she briefly toyed with the idea of flirting back with an athlete or someone vaguely famous (I was always the one drawn to athletic types in our younger years!).

Rather… I was horrified that the perpetrator in question was a bloody coach and not one of the players.

It was a not-so-timely reminder that we were (in fact) in our mid-late 30s, an age at which most elite athletes have passed their peaks and become coaches or trainers or media personalities and the like (or bankrupt and living on unemployment benefits). I realised it should have been obvious to me that she / we were no longer going to attract virile and buff young hunks; rather retired has-beens who’ve been around the block a time or two.

A friend and I had a conversation about ‘men’ a couple of days ago, both commenting that we have trouble working out a man’s age. An issue which is more problematic as we get older. So, when perving… at bars, coffee shops or on public transport, I’ll often see a guy I think is attractive but then wonder if he could (in fact) be 15 years my junior. (Which is fine if you look like Demi Moore!) 

On such occasions I look around at the greying or balding ‘older’ men and realise that THEY should be – in fact – my target market! It depresses me to see men my own age as so many of them look SO BLOODY OLD. (And surely I’m not THAT old and I don’t look like that!?!?! Surely.)

Argh! I mean, I’m hardly a spring chicken and I am far from a good catch. So… I’ve been panicking that my taste in the opposite sex, hasn’t quite caught up with my biological age! Perhaps I’m like those middle aged men still thinking I’m gonna pick-up some twenty-something college student. Although in reality, my reaction on seeing ‘older’ men is that they look too mature and grown-up for someone like me who really hasn’t got their shit together.

However… I was watching TV the other night – and as it’s summer and non-ratings season – options are limited. My Wednesday night TV-watching fodder has become the US show Grimm (obviously a modern day ‘take’ on Grimms’ fairytales). I’d heard about the show long before it appeared on our screens as an actor I find sexy attractive is one of the lead characters and, as technology allows us to cyber-stalk celebrities, I’ve been following him on Twitter since seeing him on the ill-fated show, Caprica.

Sasha Roiz is (ahem) almost my age, tall and incredibly handsome. Finding myself attracted to him, I’m sure you’ll agree, is ridiculously easy and understandable.

However… the thing that occurred to me the other night is that – on the show, Grimm, he’s the boss. Shit! My natural reaction when realising this the other night was one of horror.

I mean, shouldn’t I be attracted to the young lead character for god’s sake?! NOT his Captain. Next thing you know I’ll be fantasising over the old boss in Law & Order SVU rather than the hunky young detectives.

But, I must confess, on the other hand, I liked the notion that I have in fact evolved enough as a person that – if I was to watch shows like Gossip Girl or the new Beverley Hills 90210, I’d be attracted to the fathers, not the 20 year old lead characters! I hope.

So… as I’m starting to feel my age and (ahem) maturity, I’ll take solace in that thought, rather than the reality that soon I’ll be checking out the grandfathers!

Do you sometimes find yourself perving at men/women significantly younger than is, well… realistic/appropriate?
Are you in denial that you are actually getting older?


  • Mel
    December 22, 2012

    I am mostly an age-appropriate perver! With the exception of Daniel Craig & Brad Pitt who are late 40s, and [wait for it] Matt Preston who I find incredibly attractive (!), I mostly perve on Hollywood hunks like Ryan Gosling & Ryan Reynolds…..the only young one is Zac Efron who is HOT and 10 years younger! Have you seen ‘The Lucky One’?!!!! Great girls night in/alone!

    • Debbish
      December 23, 2012

      Zac Efron doesn’t really do it for me… too cute, but there are some youngsters I occasionally moon over before remembering they’re a bit young for me! *Sigh*

  • Natalie (extralargeaslife)
    December 22, 2012

    I like older men, I would often shock some of my friends back in the day with liking the father, or older brother on TV.

    • Debbish
      December 23, 2012

      I remember watching some shows like ‘The OC’ and similar and worrying I was relating to the kids’ story lines rather than the parents (who I was closer in age to!!!).

  • jeanie
    December 31, 2012

    I always aimed for the older man, the major advantage of which is that they are now age-appropriate for me!

    When we were teenagers, my sister got chatted up by the captain of the Queensland Cricket team and invited back to swim in the pool where they were staying. She was 13 – and wisely said no.

    • Debbish
      January 1, 2013

      I think most of my problem is that I’m in denial about how old I really am now… so men my age look positively ancient. (Unlike me of course!)

  • kelley @ magnetboldtoo
    January 3, 2013

    My daughter thinks that the sexiest man on earth is Johnny Depp. Her best friend is madly in lust with NIKKI SIXX FROM MOTLEY CRUE!

    It doesn’t matter to them at all that they are ten years older than ME. You don’t have to settle for old dudes that look like old dudes.

    • Debbish
      January 4, 2013

      Our taste in the opposite sex is a very strange thing. My first crush (as a child) was Dr Spock of Star Trek fame. SERIOUSLY. (Not sure if it was the ears, no-nonsense attitude, blue skivvy or superior intelligence! I doubt I wanted him for his body!)

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