Let’s talk… toilet paper usage

Sunday, September 14, 2014 Permalink

I recently mentioned I had a friend coming to visit (and was a bit nervous about what to feed him). Thankfully the visit went smoothly and he departed unscathed.

Now this friend is quite learned and well travelled. Indeed, he’s just retired early after (his last) diplomatic posting to a hot-spot in / near the Middle East. So naturally you’re assuming we spoke about very esoteric and complex topics such as the crisis in Syria, international development and foreign policy.

Ummm… kinda. Well that and toilet paper.

There we were dining at the best restaurant Hervey Bay has to offer… talking toilet paper.

I’m sure it won’t surprise you to know that I started the conversation; by telling him whenever I buy toilet paper I think of him. (I’m a sweet-talker like that!)

And before you jump to conclusions or your mind boggles beyond its boundaries, it’s because he and I once had a few enlightening conversations about toilet paper usage.

We hung out a lot when we were posted to East Timor and one day when shopping we stocked up on toilet paper. The (one) store had HUGE bags of the stuff. Like 20 rolls or something.

tp

Several weeks (or maybe a month or so) passed and I mentioned that I needed to go shopping and buy more toilet paper. My friend was aghast!

“You just bought some!” he said.

“That was weeks ago. I’m almost out.”

At which point he told me he was on (like) his second roll or something.

That conversation and the one at dinner then centred around toilet paper usage. Aside from the obvious boy vs girl thing, it occurred to me that the way we use toilet paper is a reflection of our personalities.

My friend said he grew up in a household where they were told to use three pieces. Only. And he sticks to his toilet paper budget to this day.

Whereas I fling the bloody stuff out of the roll and wrap it around my first or scrunch it up (you know… #whatevs).

It’s never really occurred to me that I should conserve it and I’m sure environmentalists (or sane peeps) out there will be reading this in horror. But hey… a girl needs SOME pampering!

I’m the same with other things. I get it, use it. Get more. Use more. Food, money, toilet paper and so forth. (Restriction is NOT my friend!)

My recent houseguest is far more frugal. He saves and makes careful decisions. The result – he’s slim, responsible and financially secure; whereas I’m fat and stress about how I’m gonna pay my bills.

Like I said – we’re poles apart in personality and habits. Mostly that doesn’t bother me, but I probably ‘could’ *ahem* adapt my toilet paper-related behaviour a little.

Are you conservative in your toilet paper usage?
And the age-old question – are you a folder or scruncher? 

PS. I should mention I have an entire post drafted about my cold / flu and self-medicating (and how life is f*cked), but in retrospect, it was kinda depressing. So not funny at all.

Joining the LaughLinkUp today

28 Comments
  • Jo Tracey
    September 15, 2014

    OK, 1st up, folder here. Secondly…conserving toilet paper? Really? Lol…

    • Debbish
      September 15, 2014

      I know… I was worried everyone but me did it though!

  • Char
    September 15, 2014

    I have to admit to being quite conservative in my TP usage. It’s not because I’m a tight arse, though. It’s because I’ve had to unblock my toilet too many times. Let’s call it a result of ancient plumbing.

  • Lee-Anne
    September 15, 2014

    I’ve never before looked on my toilet paper usage as “pampering” LOL!!!! but now I shall.

    And I don’t want to go into too much depth on your dear friend’s TP Policy, however, I do hope he modifies (as in adds) to his regulation 3 pieces when he has food poisoning or a stomach bug (the mind boggles otherwise!)

    I’m a folder…and thanks Deb for making me giggle first thing Monday morning. 🙂

    • Debbish
      September 15, 2014

      I’m pretty sure he would modify it – when required!

  • Pinky Poinker
    September 15, 2014

    This is a funny post! I can’t believe he exists on 3 pieces of toilet paper! I’m a semi folder/scruncher and I grab way more than 3 squares. I’ve never restricted my kids either. Thanks for the chuckle Deb!

    • Debbish
      September 15, 2014

      Yes, I can’t remember my parents recommending limits. I have chatted to my mum about it since though and it sounds as if she’s more frugal than I!

  • Ed @ The Tunnel
    September 15, 2014

    Aren’t there plenty of countries (like India) where people use NO toilet paper – they wash instead? That surely gives us paper scrunchers some extra leeway.

    • Debbish
      September 15, 2014

      You should have seen some of the pictures I found when I googled ‘toilet paper’ for the pic. Some bizarre contraptions, presumably aimed at washing and drying one’s nether regions. 😉

  • Vanessa Connor (@Nessville)
    September 15, 2014

    Oh no I never bother conserving it either! And I’m a massive scruncher too. In fact, we go through so much dunny wrap here that I should probably think about schlepping out to Costco and buying those gargantuan packs. But I never bother. I just get it when it’s on special at Coles or whatever. And none of this single ply cheapo stuff either! It’s delicate down there! Ahem… Thanks for the giggles. xo

    • mumabulous
      September 15, 2014

      I love that you used the term “dunny wrap”.

      • Debbish
        September 15, 2014

        Aussie Aussie Aussie, oi oi oi! 🙂

    • Debbish
      September 15, 2014

      Oh yes, am the same – none of the cheap stuff!

  • jsteuten
    September 15, 2014

    Ok, here’s a bit of TMI that I can’t believe I’m sharing, but it’s topical. My hubby is a ‘3 squares’ kind of guy. And I don’t recommend it… The undies never lie…
    And someone else I know, who shall remain anonymous, prefers to use TOWELS. Frickin bath towels!

    • Debbish
      September 15, 2014

      Argh! You’d never want to stay at their place for fear the towel they’d given you hadn’t been washed well!

  • hugzillablog
    September 15, 2014

    Team Half-a-Roll Scruncher!! I will keep my luxurious handfuls of soft white toilet paper thank you very much.

  • mumabulous
    September 15, 2014

    Some people go through it at an alarming rate. We buy palettes of the stuff for my husband’s office and marvel at how quickly it disappears. Its like some people are drafting the great Australian novel on it.

    • Debbish
      September 15, 2014

      I started working with an office full of men last year and even though I’m only there 2 days a week and *ahem* rarely require ‘much’ during the day, I’m sure they’ve noticed the increased usage!

  • Bec @ The Plumbette
    September 15, 2014

    Too much toilet paper can cause blockages. I’m not sure if we’re high users or not. All I know is that it’s the one thing I hate running out of!

    • Debbish
      September 15, 2014

      Ahh yes… that’s when tissues come in handy!

  • Have A Laugh On Me
    September 15, 2014

    I think whatever you write is great, post the cold one tomorrow! As for loo paper, I used to be frugal but now I buy 3-ply nice stuff and am always in such a hurry I yank the stuff in a hurry without bothering to count, ain’t NOBODY got time for dat! Thanks for linking! Em xx

    • Debbish
      September 15, 2014

      Ha! Love it! (And so true… life’s short etc)

  • Jess
    September 15, 2014

    This reminds me of he first time I lived out of home with two male house mates who were perplexed by my toilet paper usage! I definitely don’t use sparingly! Definitely ball it up and use freely!

    • Debbish
      September 16, 2014

      Ah yes – the gender thing had never occurred to me until my friend and I first had the conversation!

  • Natalie
    September 16, 2014

    Hahah, my boyfriend and I have had this convo often, he’s amazed at the amount of toilet paper I go through. I never really thought about it until he mentioned it, and well, next time I went, I did as I normally did and thought, “do I really need that much paper?”. And no, I don’t, but I guess it’s just become habit. I don’t have a set scrunch or fold, I think it depends on the mood 😛

    • Debbish
      September 16, 2014

      Plus there’s the whole gender thing of course (girls needing – ahem – twice as much….).

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