A US blogger I read (and now know virtually), Karen CL Anderson, talks about the art of ‘practice’. She talks about ‘practicing’ acceptance, mindfulness and many many other things. Other than the whole US / non US spelling of the verb (to PRACTISE! Grrrr….) I like the concept of committing to attempt something with the aim of improving.
I, for one, am loath to commit myself to something I might fail… so ‘practising’ is perfect for me.
And today I’m also inspired by author and bright and bubbly blogger Anita Heiss and ‘practising’ gratitude.
I’m pretty sure there’s a ‘what I’m grateful for’ day in the blogging world when one is supposed to write about gratitude. Like the ‘Meatless Monday’ or the ‘What I ate Wednesday’ themes. Nevertheless I’m bucking the trend and writing about whatever the hell I want whenever the hell I want.
And today I’m writing about gratitude: not something which features strongly in either of my blogs!
But… it’s all relative.
I arrived back from my weekend Problogger Training Event unwell, becoming increasingly more so as Sunday continued. By Monday… I. Felt. Like. Crap. I mean, seriously.
I’d planned a big week. I’m in the midst of moving house – having only had the sale of my property confirmed the night before I left to go to Melbourne. And I’d committed to go and look at a property in my future hometown.
Being unwell was on my ‘To-D0’ list.
As Monday drew to a close I felt shittier than I could ever remember. When I went out to get fuel for my trip the following day I struggled to walk across the road without breaking into a coughing fit, causing my head to almost explode. The pain was such I could barely sit still. I dosed myself up and reminisced about what it was like to not be sick (yes… I’m sure everyone can relate to that little fantasy!). I packed and lugged bags and boxes about between nanna naps while self-medicating obsessively. And… I crossed my fingers that I would be better on Tuesday when I was required to get in my car and drive for 3+ hours.
Tuesday dawned. I was awake early – coughing badly, but the very sore throat and head-splitting headache were gone. Sadly each time I coughed it felt like ribs were splitting open, but that seemed to be the main problem. Relieved… I left on my trip a couple of hours earlier than planned.
Throughout the day I moaned as I tried to not-cough to avoid rib-pain, which resulted in an ability to get rid of phlegmy substance and a continued need to cough. My voice was still barely existent and I panted as I spoke.
But… I was also VERY conscious that it could have been worse. I could have felt like I had the day before.
“I just hope,” I said, “that tomorrow I felt better again.”
My mother, who’d also been sick, said her latest cold had hung around for weeks. (As had my previous one.)
“As long as I can breathe properly and it doesn’t hurt too much, I don’t mind a runny nose and cough,” I decided.
And… here I am today. Awake at some ungodly hour – yet again – but feeling a bit better. I still have a cough. My nose is running. My voice is pretty croaky and I’m still wheezing, but… my ribs hurt less. My head hurts less.
Like I said, it’s all relative. Next on my agenda I return to my current hometown to pack up my place. It seems the offer I put in on a property yesterday has been accepted, so I need to continue trying to work out how to fit stuff from a three bedroom, three level townhouse into a small two-bedroom apartment.
I’m in the midst of transforming my life (more on that to come!) but in the interim I need to keep plugging away as there’s a lot to do.
I suspect I’ll crash and burn after the 3hr drive back home this morning, but then I’ll pick myself up – dose myself up – and continue on my merry way. And I’m sure tomorrow I’ll feel even less-unwell. And for that I will continue to be grateful!
PS. I do realise that a cold / flu (even a debilitating one) is NOTHING compared to what some people go through, but… it sure did feel like the end of the world for a day or so there!
Can you relate?
October 17, 2012
Practicing gratitude is something we should all do more of. Great piece. Very thought provoking.
October 18, 2012
Thanks…. and thanks for your comment. Am trying really hard to remind myself of the need to continue to practise and REMEMBER how crappy I felt earlier in the week!
October 17, 2012
You know? I get the whole thing about being grateful that you’re not sicker than you are…and acknowledging that others have it much worse off, but sometimes, in the moment, it’s okay to say “woe is me!” I think it’s what allows us to move on. The difference is being aware of our whinging (I love that word) versus doing it unconsciously, where it becomes the norm.
Anyhoo, I am glad you’re on the mend!
October 18, 2012
Thanks Karen. I think the relativity thing is good for me as I’m such a black/white all/nothing person in general!