I shared this link from BuzzFeed on Facebook the other day: 10 things to say in meetings to sound more intelligent.
The pics (and probably the quotes) in question are from a new Aussie TV show called Utopia.
The show’s a spoof centred around a government agency – the Nation Building Authority – an agency charged with well, you know… nation-building.
From the BuzzFeed article
Although it’s a couple of years since I’ve worked in government I find it disturbingly realistic: governments keen to win votes or return favours and making ridiculous decisions as a result. (Sound familiar?!)
The show’s the product of the very talented Working Dog Productions who were previously involved with The Hollowmen – another spoof based around policy staff in the Prime Minister’s office.
I still remember the night the first episode of that show aired.
I was working in my own state’s Department of the Premier and Cabinet. That day the Premier had a last-minute meeting with some high profile (and very outspoken and belligerent) sector representatives. So… we had a call from the Premier’s office who wanted us to find ‘something’ the Premier could announce – following their meeting.
As a result I spent HOURS ringing around a couple of agencies for potential options. Of course we had some really good and useful recommendations – developed as a result of extensive consultations. But they weren’t quick fixes. And they weren’t sexy. They were merely practical.
As a result some half-arsed announcement was made (and band-aid solution commenced)*. It was an exhausting day and I can’t recall the detail but assume I eventually got home, had a calming wine or three and scoffed some dinner. And turned on the television.
The first episode of The Hollowmen which aired focussed on the PM wanting to make a ‘policy’ announcement – and everyone rushing around to find a suitably exciting and sexy option.
Oh. My. God!
If it hadn’t been months into production I might have wondered if someone had cameras in our office…
And now we have Utopia. I expect to some it seems ridiculous. I WANT to believe it’s completely over-the-top. However… I suspect many in government and other large organisations can relate. In fact, on seeing the BuzzFeed article the other day I was reminded of the Bureaucratic Buzzwords Bingo I had pinned to my cubical wall (back in the day).
Source: stormeyes.org
Having said all of that and poking fun… I really have to confess I’m fairly sure a lot of my briefing notes and speaking points included MANY of these. What can I say?! I’m a bureaucrat at heart!
Are you a user of bureaucratic speak?
Moving forward… what phrase do you want to see gone forever?
Linking up for IBOT with Essentially Jess today.
* PS. I should actually mention, as a long-term public servant I ‘get’ the need to placate the squeaky wheel and desire for short-term fixes.
September 23, 2014
Weasel Words! God you should hear the weasel words used in education. I start to feel queasy when people start using them. It makes me want to scream! I can imagine how well some TV shows reflect real life.
September 23, 2014
Oh, it’s truly scary!
September 23, 2014
But of course you have to use the lingo or your co-workers won’t understand what you’re saying.
September 23, 2014
I hear what you’re saying Char, but…. 😉
September 23, 2014
One place I worked developed an app for their acronyms and lingo…to me that would have been a sign that they should just speak normally…
September 23, 2014
Oh yes, the acronyms. I think almost every report nowadays has a list of acronyms in the front of it!
September 23, 2014
Deb – I so relate. I was a bit slow on the uptake of Utopia but reckon it cuts so close to the bone. I’m on my third stint working in government – marketing/comms/economic development (first time lasted 4 years, second time 2 years 4 months, this stint bang on 2 years (4 days a week) and I CAN’T STAND IT ANYMORE!). In between I’ve worked as a consultant, parented, worked in education and lived overseas. I think I just have to go back to working from home, writing, consulting, escaping the bureaucracy.
September 23, 2014
I worked a lot with elected officials etc previously and I have to say I have no real desire to go back to that!
September 23, 2014
In my last days as a public servant I am finding myself trying to distance myself more and more from this language but you work within the environment you operate within. I think Utopia is a little too close to home – I have found myself cringing as much as laughing when I’ve watched it – very uncanny.
September 23, 2014
I missed the first couple of eps so must see if I can catch up at some point as I’m loving the show.
September 23, 2014
Hilarious! My Mum and her partner are Principals, so not beaurucrats per se but many of their convos sound like they borrow extensively from your bingo list!
September 23, 2014
I have to confess when I’m doing my book reviews I note I use cliches all of the bloody time!
September 23, 2014
I’m an expert on collaborative learning technology!! 🙂 I’m very familiar with many of the words because I used to work for a large European Union Research and Development Project. Naturally, most of our time was spent producing the documentation for the project,not for research or development.
September 24, 2014
Hee hee Satu – I’m not surprised!
September 23, 2014
Haha I used to play this in my last job to liven up boring meetings. Maybe that’s the real reason I got made redundant LOL?!
September 24, 2014
I actually managed reporting, correspondence and briefing stuff in most of my final years in government so I could really relate. Sadly I also perpetuated the weasel-word usage! 🙂
September 24, 2014
i have never even heard of these shows!? Are they on Foxtel or something? We are poor free-to-airers here! haha. They sound like shows I’d love to watch though! I think I’ll have to store some of those sayings in my memory bank! -Aroha (for #teamIBOT)
September 24, 2014
Ah no Aroha, they’re on ABC! Not particularly well publicised though! Utopia’s currently on Wed & repeated Sunday I think.
Deb
September 24, 2014
OMG how have I not heard of Utopia?!? I love just about everything Working Dog have ever done, will have to check it out. I’ve always worked in the private sector and there is just as much business-jargon-bullshit there as well.
September 25, 2014
It probably only started in early – mid August so we’re not too far into the season yet!
September 24, 2014
I loved the hollow men! Actually I’m pretty much a fan of anything Working Dog do, so I’ll have to check this one out.
September 25, 2014
Definitely Jess. Wednesday nights (and repeated on Sunday).
September 25, 2014
Working Dog just seem to know how to strike a good balance when it comes to making fun of the “real world”.
It’s so long since I’ve even been in the workforce, but my husband drops some work-speak into conversation every now and then.
September 25, 2014
Oh yes, the Working Dog group is very clever! I like most of their stuff!
October 1, 2014
It’s scary how you get used to jargon, though, isn’t it? I remember someone asking me if I had ‘capacity’, and if I had ‘visibility’ of an issue – so weird then, not sure now why it was so funny….
Read the 30 most common ADF phrases over at Grumpy Aussie’s blog and had a laugh there too. Great post, Deb. 🙂
October 1, 2014
Thanks Susan.