This time next week the loved-up among us will be celebrating Valentine’s Day. The remainder will just be happy it’s Friday and relieved Keith Urban finally got his hair cut (as we spend the night watching American Idol). Or maybe that’s just me?!
I’m pretty much accustomed to being single on Valentine’s Day so very zen about the whole thing; but I know that’s not the case for everyone.
So, whether the day makes you wallow in relationship envy or tempts you to poke your eyes out with your thumbs (from all of the schmaltz)… these five hints will help you survive the day.
1. Do not – under any circumstances – go out with a friend for dinner
There’s nothing more tragic than a couple of girls or guys ‘rebelling’ against the system or flaunting their nonchalance by heading to a lovely restaurant for a not-so-romantic dinner on Valentine’s Day. No matter how hard you try or how evolved you are, you WILL end up feeling self-conscious amidst all of the sappy couples.
2. Steer clear of singles events
It has to be said… attending a singles event on Valentine’s Day kinda reeks of desperation. Any other night of the year, yes… go for it. But hoping to meet the man/woman-of-your-dreams on the most romantic night of the year… well, hand me the vomit bucket.
3. Do not get drunk
It seems like a good idea at the time. (Doesn’t it always?!)
“Fuckin’ wankers,” you might say… scoffing at those who’ve contributed to a floundering economy by spending triple the amount on roses than they would cost any other day. Or… you may be feeling maudlin… “Why am I all alone? Why doesn’t anyone love meeeee?”
Either way you’ll end up pissed and pathetic – a ranting lunatic or sobbing mess.
4. Stay away from social media
I recently removed Instagram from my iPhone and iPad so I’m no longer am tempted to peer into others’ lives when I’m bored. Facebook, Twitter and Instagram will be a NIGHTMARE on Valentine’s Day if you’re prone to life-envy. Undoubtedly there’ll be pictures of gifts, fabulous meals and happy couples. #vomit
I’d recommend having an online detox for the day, which is probably what I’ll do. Unless I decide to spend the day sharing Anti-Valentine’s Day Memes or something equally mature.
5. Avoid leaving the house if at all possible
In fact, here’s the best tip I can offer: Stay home.
Do not leave the house. Skip work if at all feasible. Otherwise your day will be filled with colleagues getting flower deliveries, showing off their new gifts or skiving off for a long lunch or pre-dinner primping – landing you with their workload.
Of course if you don’t work, you really don’t want to be on the streets to see the smiling faces of flower-laden women or gorgeous men bearing gifts.
There’s a lot to be said for being single. Many of my friends tell me they envy me my freedom. As I said, I’m kinda used to it so it doesn’t bother me. Much. Obviously.
Are you part of a couple?
Do you have Valentine’s Day plans either way?
Any other suggestions for we singletons?
I’m flogging my blog With Some Grace today.
February 7, 2014
It’s commercialism at its worst. I forbade any boyfriend or husband from giving me anything after about age 22. I’d go out with a girlfriend if I was single and felt like it though!
February 7, 2014
I’m always agog by how much trashy stuff is available for Valentine’s Day!
February 7, 2014
We’ve never celebrated Valentines Day. In the whole 25 years we’ve been together. I abhor the commercial sweetness of it. My husband tells me that each year he orders flowers from this florist in Canberra…they’re yet to be delivered 😉
February 7, 2014
Hee hee!
February 7, 2014
My hubbies birthday falls on Valentines Day and we still celebrate Valentines Day but it’s because we are so grateful to have found a partner that we want to share the rest of our lives with. I usually get roses and hubby gets chocolates from me and his actual birthday presents. It’s very commercialised now isn’t it? We like to have fun with it.
February 7, 2014
Glad you and your hubby appreciate the day, but yes… the commercialism gets a bit much doesn’t it!!!
x
February 7, 2014
So much worse to be part of an unhappy couple than to be single. The grass is always greener…
February 8, 2014
Oh definitely. I’m like that re a partner and kids – would give anything to have them but my friends tell me I’m mad!
February 8, 2014
Hilarious post. Even though it is commercialised I like the idea behind Valentines day, because I think it is important for people in relationships to take time out for each other. Although now I am married we never do anything for it, my husband is not a romantic and being close after Xmas and start of the year we never want to spend money right now.
February 8, 2014
I notice Jess that more and more couples now talk about ‘date’ night – which wasn’t really a thing years ago. I actually like the idea cos it seems the notion is about purposely (and purposefully) taking time to recognise the importance of relationships.
February 9, 2014
I’m pretty sure my Valentine’s Day won’t be much different from yours. No flowers, no gifts, no declarations of love – I’m married to one of the great anti-romantics who thinks that VD is a ploy by the retail secotr to pry his wallet open.
February 9, 2014
Ohhhh… Perhaps you’re the romantic one then?!
February 9, 2014
Not leaving the house on V day is excellent advice for anyone!
February 9, 2014
Yes indeedy. Of course I should have added that people may need to steer clear of RomComs on TV as well! Am sure we’ll be inundated with them.
February 10, 2014
Good advice, Deb! 🙂 Luckily Valentine’s day isn’t huge in Finland so I don’t have to worry about it – I’m only going to send a couple of cards – one to my mom and one to my best friend (!) and that’s it.
I think you could write a short story about thje zombie apocalypse starting on VD- singles would be spared because they stayed indoors. I feel tempted to write about it myself. ::-)
February 10, 2014
Oh yes… perhaps we could collaborate on the zombie apocalypse from a global point of view!
February 10, 2014
I like that quote flitting around the internet at the moment ‘Screw Valentines Day. Fat babies carrying bows and arrows are creepy anyway.’
February 10, 2014
Says the girl who was cheesy enough to write about her engagement anniversary! I just realised the irony…but seriously, I hate the commercialism of V.Day!
I actually don’t like how commercial most ‘days’ are becoming commercial now. Christmas, Easter, etc. I mean, I happened along Easter eggs and hot cross buns on New Years Eve! Where is the decency?
February 10, 2014
True. I haven’t seen easter eggs yet, but guess they’re out. (Best I don’t know given my weakness for Red Tulip chocolate!)
February 10, 2014
Oh, I haven’t seen that one!
February 13, 2016
I like getting a thoughtfully written card on Valentines Day, but otherwise I’ve always hated the over priced forcedness of the day (that’s a word, right?!).
February 13, 2016
Sure it’s a word! 🙂