When numbers have no meaning

Wednesday, May 9, 2012 Permalink

The Oz federal budget was released last night, so news feeds and social media here have been abuzz with talk of dollars, cents and numbers of all kinds. I must confess that the annual budgets don’t usually result in any additional benefits for me (often the opposite), so I pay little attention.

Rather, I’ve been pondering on the relative importance of numbers: when they matter; and when they have no meaning.

I’ve long contemplated the ‘to weigh, or not to weigh’ concept. I’ve written about being defined by numbers AND the fact that I let the scale judge me and my behaviour.

The not-dieting approach I am considering (attempting?) recommends not-weighing, or not over-weighing… if that makes sense.

I’m yet to work out exactly what approach I need to take and for that reason I initially decided against participating in Chubby Girlfriend’s May challenge – to lose 1 pound each week. The challenge was issued early last week when I was in a state of flux after some unhealthy eating episodes and – as a result – was reticent to go anywhere near a set of scales! Fortunately Chubby GF was flexible in her approach and said we could use measurements or similar, but then…

[blackbirdpie url=”https://twitter.com/#!/Schmiet/status/197246554141233152″]

My actual weight aside, Chubby GF’s challenge involved pounds. We (here in Oz) are so evolved (!!!) we work in kilograms and centimetres and the whole (you know…) metric system. Given that nearly half of my blog readers are non-Aussies I’m conscious of this and try to translate kilograms into pounds (etc) when possible. I figured in this instance I’d do the same. I’d weigh myself and then translate it from kilograms into pounds for the challenge. But then…. I remembered that I could – of course – change the measure on my actual scale. D’oh!

So I did. And dutifully took a picture (of the weight in pounds) as required for the challenge. The number in kilograms had been a couple of kgs heavier (resulting from the aforementioned unhealthy eating) and typically depressed me. But the number in pounds… meant NOTHING!

ok, let's do the math...actually, forget the numbers, let's muddle our way through...It reminded me of comments I made about my measurements in one of my earlier posts. Although I said I felt TERRIBLY judged by the numbers on the scale – bizarrely – the numbers on the tape measure meant NOTHING. Sure I knew they were way more than they should be… but 130cm, 110cm, 100cm… W-O-T-E-V-A!

As required this week I got on the scale (still set in pounds) and it had gone down a little. But… the numbers still meant nothing.

I recall years ago trying to focus on the weight loss only, starting with the non-confrontational: 0; and measuring my weight in -1.0kg, -2.5kg and the like. I graphed the kilograms lost rather than those remaining on my body!

Although I’m sure that I’ll still jump on and off the scale more than I should HOPING for lower and lower numbers, I’m kinda liking that the numbers on there (at the moment anyway) are meaningless. I’ve been hovering around the same weight (105.5 – 109kg) for the last six months and I keep seeing the same numbers on the scale – up, down, up, down. So it’s refreshing to not constantly be reminded of my dream to reach double digits or the sense of deja vu each time I see 107kg appear.

I wonder if this is just a case of ‘pot-ay-to / pot-ar-to’ and if within weeks I’m as obsessed with the pounds as I have been with the kilograms?

I’m still on my not-dieting path and haven’t done any bingeing for a little while. AND… I’ve been eating those things I haven’t for a while – pasta (including ravioli), rice and noodles and the like… AND potato on non-weekend nights. I’m not yet eating intuitively and mindfully (considering when I’m full and stopping rather than polishing off whatever’s on my plate), but I’m trying – for a change – to trust myself a little.

I know the scale can torment even the sanest and most zen of people. 
Do you weigh, or not-weigh? Or are you somewhere in between?  

Do some numbers matter to you more than others?

 

25 Comments
  • Julia
    May 9, 2012

    Deb – first, just so you know, I don’t use that twitter anymore! I’m off the little bird. Sorry!

    Second, and much more importantly – you did SO WELL this week – 4 LBS! That is SO MUCH! But that isn’t why I want to congratulate you – I want to congratulate you because your attitude is so positive. You’ve found a way to get on the scale without it derailing your life, and in a way, I think that is why you had such a wonderful start to the challenge. If you only lose half of a pound until the end of the month, you’ve already beaten the challenge. And really, your challenge is all mental, and it seems you are getting on with that too. BRAVO DEB! BRAVO!

    • Debbish
      May 9, 2012

      Ha… so you didn’t see my tweet anyway!

      And, thanks for your lovely comments… xxxx

  • jules- big girl bombshell
    May 9, 2012

    Deb..well, you read my post about weighing…I find at times in the midst of my *focus* I have been known to step on the scale a few times a day…and embarrassing I have a scale in each bathroom and weigh on both…

    When I first started my treatment, I had to agree with my doc to only step on the scale once a week and only the morning before our appointments, so we could talk about it. The mindful-intuitive eating is a great plan…but for me, I have had to work on the general sense of mindful and intuitive (trust) before I can apply it to the eating..

    • Debbish
      May 9, 2012

      I’m think I’m there as well Jules – my mind and body are so detached it may take a while to integrate them again!!!!

      I hadn’t actually gotten on the scale since last week so this week’s loss was a happy surprise. I won’t assume it will happen again however, but probably staying off until next week could be my first goal!
      Deb

  • Katy
    May 9, 2012

    oooh, I’m really curious about this May challenge, I may go check it out.

    and may the scales move quickly for you 🙂

    • Debbish
      May 9, 2012

      Thanks Katy… and do check it out!

  • Amy
    May 9, 2012

    Just saw this on Source bottle and thought of you http://www.thesourcebottle.com/query.asp?iid=20&qid=14914

    • Debbish
      May 9, 2012

      Will have a look. Thanks Amy!

  • Marion
    May 9, 2012

    I remember learning metric in the ’70’s when we thought the US would go metric, but it never did. I personally think that my weight in kgs sounds a LOT smaller, than it really is. But in the US, we fool ourselves with our clothing sizes. The size 12 jeans I’m wearing would be size 14 in Europe.

    I think you sound incredibly upbeat. Wishing you the greatest of luck and *skill* for your challenge. Use all of the analyzing logic you have to figure out how to eat less each day. I’m getting almost sly about my tricks to eat less. 😀

    🙂 Marion

    • Debbish
      May 10, 2012

      Thanks Marion…

  • Rebecca
    May 9, 2012

    Since I’ve started weighing monthly I am more focussed on my health and way less focussed on the scale and I’m so so much more relaxed!

    • Debbish
      May 10, 2012

      Yes, if I can stay off the scale and weigh regularly I think it would be a good thing!

  • Karen@WaistingTime
    May 9, 2012

    At the risk of having people hate me for my response, I’m going to be honest here and say something rather controversial. Yes, I do weigh. Yes, I do have a number in my head that I want to be. BUT, one major change in my thinking over the past few years, much thanks to what I’ve learned in the world of healthy living bloggers, is that we should focus on what we can control and that is never the scale. And it is also never a given number of pounds to lose as a goal in a given period of time.

    We can only control our own behavior. (Okay, in theory, that is. Because sometimes it seems I cannot control my behavior at all! But I digress.) This epiphany has led me to think that we should be setting goals over which we can actually control the outcome. For example, not eating any candy or junk food this week, or exercising 30 minutes a day every day. We can do everything right as far as “dieting” and still not see the desired/expected results on the scale. The scale is fickle.

    So, I’d love to see people get away from challenges about pounds lost and instead strive for behavioral change.

    Please don’t shoot me!

    • KCLAnderson (Karen)
      May 10, 2012

      Karen…this is brilliant too!! I love it!

      • Debbish
        May 10, 2012

        Agreed… I completely understand!

    • Debbish
      May 10, 2012

      No firing squads here – and I do get where you’re coming from cos initially I didn’t want to participate in the challenge cos of the whole weighing thing (was going to use another measurement), but because it’s informal I felt a lot more comfortable about it. I was surprised there was a loss this week – though my first weigh-in was coming off a long unhealthy weekend, so I expect that skewed my first result!

  • KCLAnderson (Karen)
    May 10, 2012

    You are brilliant!! And it’s funny because it almost makes me want to go out and get a scale and set it to kilograms instead of pounds because it wouldn’t mean anything…this is really the key! To understand ourselves enough to know was triggers negativity. And I love your last line…BRAVA!!

    • Debbish
      May 10, 2012

      Karen, It seems to allow me to measure and monitor, but not judge – if that makes sense!

      I mentioned in previous posts that – on occasions – I had other people weigh me and just tell me if the number was up or down on previous weeks without telling me what I weighed. I was interested to know about the gain / loss, but not what I actually weighed!

  • Eating as a Path to Yoga
    May 10, 2012

    I am somewhere in between. I try to just weigh once a month, use it to collect data. Sometimes there is more weighing, usually as a method to make myself feel better, which never works out well.

    Since I am working on my BED, I’ve been advised to put weight loss on the back burner, so I can work on being more mindful and present.

    • Debbish
      May 10, 2012

      I’m trying to do the same… (focus on being mindful etc) and weigh less. I like your comment about ‘collecting data’ is good – takes the emotion and baggage out of the scale and weighing process!

      Deb

  • Lou Lou
    May 11, 2012

    Good luck with the May challenge!

    • Debbish
      May 11, 2012

      Thanks Lou Lou. So far so good… but I’m feeling very laid back about it as it feels like it’s taking place in a fostering / supportive environment. (No big sticks if I ‘fail’ to lose weight!)

  • Satu
    May 12, 2012

    I didn’t weigh myself at all for 2.5 years, because my scales tormented me! 🙂 During that time I gained ~11 kg, for various reasons. I started regularly weighing myself again this spring, and I also take comparison pictures of myself with my digital camera.

    The scale bahavior is every erratic if you lose weight slowly. Numbers on a scale are almost of no use, and I would be going crazy if I didn’t have my comparison pictures. :-9

    • Satu
      May 13, 2012

      My, I completely managed to NOT get the point of your post! I had to come read it again… 🙂

      Excellent post!

      • Debbish
        May 13, 2012

        I completely understand Satu – plus my posts are often very meandering… I start on one topic and move off onto something else (etc).

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