I’ve written about this before, but my dietician/psychologist suggested it was something I needed to think more about: Tomorrow. Or more specifically, the fact that I’m always gonna restart my diet (aka healthy eating regime) ‘tomorrow’. Or Monday, if ‘tomorrow’ isn’t Monday. Or after the holidays, if I’m on holidays. You know what I mean… quite frankly, anytime but now.
I googled the lyrics of the song ‘Tomorrow’ from Annie to see if it was ‘only’ a day away; or ‘always’ a day away… and bizarrely got both! And, in all honesty, either will do. The fact that tomorrow is ‘always’ a day away, means I can still enjoy what I want, UNTIL then; and the fact that it’s ‘only’ a day away, means that salvation (in the form of sudden motivation and ‘good’ eating behaviour and therefore weight loss) will be imminent. It’s a win-win situation.
Although not quite. I had my third appointment with my therapist on Saturday. We chatted about life in general for a bit before I confessed to my recent wayward behaviour. I waited even longer before presenting my food logs – which I did diligently keep for the 14 days between appointments. My scribbled pages appeared to cement her plans for me over the coming weeks as she circled and scribbled notes on them. And again, I have homework. AND more instructions – but more on those another day.
I shrank further and further into my chair as the instructions were issued.
“But, I can start Monday?” I said in a pleadingly hopeful voice. “No,” was the response.
“But, not today… I can go and get some rice cakes and Easter Eggs today and then start tomorrow?” I said. “No,” was the response.
“Faaaaarck!” was my next thought!
I’m all for delaying the inevitable; putting off things I really don’t want to do. And frankly, I’m even more in favour of the ‘last hurrahs’…. ie. a binge-fest which precedes the period of deprivation. It’s one reason that specialists often don’t recommend an ‘all or nothing’ approach and why many do not promote diets or restricted eating plans. Mine hasn’t… but she has, in a manner of speaking.
We identified my danger food (as did I in this post… and you’ll be surprised to know I’ve moved from corn chips and caramello koalas to cheese flavoured rice cakes and Easter Eggs) and they have been forbidden. If I could just have one or two it’d be okay. But I can’t. And one packet leads to another packet the next day, leading to two packets the following weekend and so forth. So… they are banned. From NOW. Not tomorrow.
Are you a ‘I’ll start tomorrow’ kind of person?
April 1, 2012
I’m exactly the same! And in fact, I just had lunch with a lady today who was saying ‘I’m starting a diet tomorrow so I need to eat more chocolate mousse now’. Funny how things like this go…it’s like we want to have a clean slate but really, everything is part of that overall slate – life!
April 1, 2012
So true. I think most people only think they can begin ‘diets’ on Mondays etc… AND… we all make the most of the days / hours we have before we start. I am never as enthusiastic about a diet as I am in the days before I start it!
April 1, 2012
I’m an expert tomorrow girl. I’ve been saying I’ll recommit to exercise tomorrow for quite some time now! Also have been saying that I’ll stop those naughty snacks tomorrow too! Serious lack of focus and being in the right headspace happening with me at the mo! You’re doing better than me . You’ve got that regular exercise thing happening. Good on you!!!
April 2, 2012
Thanks Min. I made it through ‘yesterday’ sans rice cakes and Easter Eggs.. still a long way to go – but like you, I’m very good on the ‘planning’, not so much on the follow-through!
April 1, 2012
What a great post, Deb! I think every dieter on the planet knows the tomorrow approach because no one in their right mind wants to jump into deprivation immediately. It’s a concept better contemplated from afar than up close. And deprivation is definitely part of the dieting mindset. And even part of the non-dieting-this-is-a-lifestyle-not-a-diet mindset when we decide certain foods are forbidden.
Back a few thousand years ago when I lost 90 pounds (and kept it off for about 2.3 seconds), I had a different approach to tomorrow that seemed to work. It was the “If I still want caramello koalas (I have no idea what those are, but I’m pretty sure I’d like them) this time tomorrow, then I will allow myself to have them.” And of course the intense craving for caramello koalas always passed – almost instantly when I made myself this tomorrow promise.
This post was perfectly timed. I was getting ready to take myself out for breakfast this morning because I was planning to start my “non-diet” tomorrow. I think I’ll opt for making a healthy choice now because — just like the poster says — if not now, then when? Thank you, Deb!
April 2, 2012
Thanks Carol, glad to have caught you at the right time! My old weight loss program talked about a lay-by system… so – a similar scenario to yours: if I want this tomorrow I can have it. The idea was that each time you ‘deferred’ your craving, you were strengthening your willpower muscle.
Deb
April 2, 2012
I’ve blogged about this (and referenced Annie as well) myself:) Yes, it is very easy for me to fall into that trap. And the “since I’m starting over tomorrow I should eat any and everything today” trap. Sigh.
April 2, 2012
So true… and then I eat more than I would normally eat ‘today’ because of the ‘starting tomorrow’ thing. Of course then when I don’t start ‘tomorrow’ I go through the whole process again!
April 2, 2012
Ah yes…for me it was always “some day,” which is even more vague than “tomorrow.”
What about reframing this: “The fact that tomorrow is ‘always’ a day away, means I can still enjoy what I want UNTIL then” to this: “I can always enjoy what I eat, no matter what day it is.”? And what about this: “enjoying food I like in healthy serving sizes on a regular basis” instead of this: “binge-fest which precedes the period of deprivation”?
I have to agree with Carol; it was only when I told myself I could have whatever I wanted, then went ahead and had it without guilt, remorse or shame, then observed what was going on around and inside me at the time, that the desire to have it would diminish. It’s like the other day when I fed my inner child instead of my outer adult. I rarely eat like I did that day, but if I had restricted and/or shamed myself, it would have done no good whatsoever and I wouldn’t have recognized it for what it was. I’ve got more coming on that whole episode because it turns out there was a physical component to the whole thing, as well.
That said, I also agree that taking those few trigger foods out of the equation for a while and finding suitable substitutes (things you love to eat but don’t overeat and/or feel guilty about) is a great idea. I did that with Goldfish crackers, Smarties, and Smartfood popcorn (funny how two of my go-to binge foods has the word “smart” in them…hmmmmm)
April 2, 2012
Karen, the good thing is that ONLY my binge-foods are off-limits at the moment – no restriction on anything else (other than sensible amounts of alcohol etc). I assume the therapist is thinking I’m not going to eat fries (hot chips) and pizza every meal, but I’m hopefully a bit beyond that myself. The thing I don’t mind about my food-journalling (for her) is that I’m not writing amounts and weighing stuff etc, so it doesn’t feel too ‘diety’.
Having said all of that – the removal of rice cakes/corn chips and chocolate does feel like deprivation. My fear of a substitute is that it will take over where the other left off. (Eg. rice cakes were supposed to be a healthy alternative to cornchips – but an entire packet has about the same no. of calories etc and now I want them MORE than cornchips). *Sigh*
Deb
April 2, 2012
I can be a ‘I’ll start tomorrow’ kind of person, except my issue is more related to cleaning :-S
Saying that, we don’t keep chocolate or crackers in our house except for the last week of the month. My husband will eat a whole packet of crackers in one sitting if they are in the cupboard, and we do eat the block of chocolate in one night if we have purchased it that day…. that’s why we set limits.
Good luck!
April 2, 2012
Thanks Amy – and you are very disciplined to have the one week/mth arrangement. But, knowing your limits is good!
PS. I think I’d be a ‘tomorrow’ kind of person with respect to cleaning as well (which is why I splurge on a fortnightly cleaner!).
Deb
April 2, 2012
Hi Deb! Well, you probably know that I was a perpetual “tomorrow” girl for watching my weight. It has helped tremendously to join a group. I’m going to get weighed, and the group will know whether I am up or down for poundage that week. If I’m up, I’ll be fined. It’s a good thing. I can’t tell you how many high calorie foods I’ve turned down because I don’t want to be fined one dollar–it’s a pride issue. 😀
🙂 Marion
April 2, 2012
I can understand that. My dietician is weighing me each fortnight I see her (I had gained last weekend – though there were some ‘time of the month’ issues!) so I guess I’m accountable now to someone (other than me) as well now!
I’m glad the group format is working for you!