As I was pondering on today’s topic (last night) I spent some time surfing through the (many many) blogs I follow. You will be relieved to know that my original topic (essentially a whinge about how I’m feeling busy and stressed) has – for the moment – been shelved. And… given that the stressors are all in the next two days, that blog post may never ever see the light of day. Which is a good thing. Believe me!

So, during my blog surfing I came across the latest post from Liz on her blog Last Chance Training. The post, Layers of Learning was so topical for me that I’ve continued thinking about it since leaving a comment.

Essentially in that post Liz (an Exercise Physiologist) talks about a boxing session she did a few weeks prior during which she (in her words) really sucked. So much so, she wondered if it was something she wanted to do again. But she did and to her surprise she morphed into Hilary Swank’s Million Dollar Baby. In her post she talks about turning negatives into positives and the fact that – when you are about to give up – success may well be just around the corner.

I was feeling a bit blah when I got home last night. This was the result of a number of things: the busy days I mentioned above; the fact that I had to meet my Real Estate Agent who I knew would – undoubtedly – try to talk me into accepting a lower sale price than I want for my house; and also the fact that I’d had a less-than-stellar session at the gym.

Given that I’m trying to be less of a glass-half-empty girl, I should say here that I was thrilled that I actually even went to the bloody gym. With a full day yesterday (and for the next few days) I’d half-thought that I’d be climbing aboard my rented exercise bike late in the evening rather than finding time to go to the gym. But I did. Go to the gym that is. So, that was good.

I started the Couch to 5km (C25k) program almost two weeks ago. I cruised through week one (8 x 1 minute runs with periods of walking in between) and felt quite good about it. Because I then visited my hometown for 5-6 days I put the running on hold as I’m not yet brave enough to run outside, in public and for such short amounts of time. But… I was indeed stoked that, at the end of my first day back at work, I diligently got changed and headed to the gym next door, all ready to embark on my first day of C25k’s Week 2 program. I’d sussed it out and discovered the runs were bumped to 90 seconds. No worries, I thought, I can run for a minute and a half. One minute was eminently doable, so I was sure another thirty seconds would be fine.

But… can I just say (forgive the language!) Holy Fuck! I only had to endure six 90 second runs but I barely staggered through the first one when I realised that I was going to struggle. My hip ached and my knees felt weak as I walked and ran my way through 29 minutes of music and English-accented instructions (via my iPhone). And… I did it; I made it through but I REALLY didn’t enjoy it. In fact, it reminded me of the days I did exercise that I dreaded so much I never went back for seconds. And… as I pounded the treadmill my little mind was working overtime as I contemplated the notion of giving up on the ‘running-5km’ plan. I mean, who cares if you can run or not? Many MANY people don’t run at all. EVER! I know a lot of people who get through their daily lives without breaking into a trot. Many are fit and healthy and walk or do other forms of exercise. But don’t run.

By the time I got home I hadn’t exactly decided I wasn’t going to return on the treadmill, but I certainly had no plan in mind as to when I would be embarking on Week 2, Day 2 of the program.

Until I read Liz’s post. And it got me thinking.

Sure it’s true I didn’t enjoy my run (if you can call it that) yesterday. Sure I have no desire to do it again. Sure I can lose weight doing other forms of exercise…. Sure it will only get worse and uglier as I progress through the program. But….

At the moment it’s something left undone. I’m sure it’s not meant to be ‘fun’…. But perhaps I could try a few more sessions before I give up on it completely. And I guess you never know, success could be hiding just around the corner.