I have now been back in my own place for nearly one week. Regular readers will recall that – once home from parent-caring duties – I was to get back on track and undo and damage inflicted on my body and the scales while away on holidays. That way, when I weigh-in this coming Saturday (4 September), the result will not send the Weight Watchers consultant from the room screaming….
Sadly, I have only managed to count points on two days during this past week. Well, in all honesty, I only tried to count points on two days. The other days I woke with good intentions, but these went out of the window as soon as I started fantasising about corn chips or chinese or pizza. Egad! And, as I have reported in the past… as an ‘all or nothing’ / ‘black vs white’ thinker… all I need is a bit of waywardness and I decide to continue with the feasting because I will (of course) start afresh the next day. Alas, alack….
Today is one of those days. A ‘starting-afresh’ day. Yesterday was a ‘why not buy two Chinese meals for lunch and eat them’ day.
Unfortunately (or fortunately from a dieting perspective), this is the last week of my holidays. As a result I am starting to stress about what I haven’t done: writing, job applications and so forth… So, not only am I overcome with guilt about my apathy on that front, but I feel bad about not dieting and about not exercising.
Today I DID have a minor win (little ripple in the sea of losses!) as I finally went out and bought the much-needed desk chair. So, as I type this, my hefty butt is much more comfortable. Gathering the motivation I needed for the chair-buying exploit, meant that I decided that I could skip my morning walk (which would have made a total of 2 – yes 2 – in one week!) as I was worried that any delay would result in loss of motivation and no new chair.
Small steps…. So, the must-buy-chair guilt is now allayed and is replaced by the I-haven’t-exercised guilt. I am, however, reminding myself of a discussion I had a while ago with a Weight Watchers consultant when I was having difficulty. She gave me permission to focus on food and the diet for a week or two and not think about exercise until I had my points under control.
I suspect I am thinking of invoking this advice out of laziness rather than anything else however… And, of course, I COULD still go for a walk. All is not lost. Yet…