Not-dieting: blog giveaway!
I’ve written a few posts over recent weeks about my proposed move to mindful or intuitive eating, rather than continuing to ‘diet’. I’ve been ‘dieting’ for over 30 years now and there have been many successes and failures during that time. My weight has ranged from 47kg to 130kg; and in more recent years, I’ve lost and gained the same 20-30kg again and again.
So, I’m trying something different. I hope. An eating disorder therapist I saw in the early 2000s suggested I read the book, If Not Dieting, Then What? by Dr Rick Kausman. So at the time, with her help, I tried ‘not-dieting’. I did quite well for a while and maintained the weight I was at… But in typical fashion I got impatient about losing more weight and quit seeing her. Old habits set in; I started dieting again, and eventually regained the weight I’d lost and more.
I re-read that book recently (writing about it here) – in an attempt to focus as much on the mindset issues relating to my weight as on the act of consuming food. The book makes a lot of sense and so I’m re-starting on that journey to focus on: eating what I want IF I really want it, when I’m hungry. I realise that – when you put it like that – it’s not really rocket science, but sometimes we (and by we, I mean me!) overthink things so much we lose touch with the basics. Habits ingrained over the last 30 years do not help matters either!
Fortuitously, just after I re-read the book, Dr Kausman released a slideshow, used in his workshops, which feature a range of slides based on his ‘empowerment cards’. The messages in these slides are powerful. Again, it isn’t rocket science but… we all need reminding.
These tools have come at a point when I have really needed them. I lost 20kg (44lbs) in a three month period last year through a weightloss program (12WBT, for those ‘in the know’). A subsequent ‘round’ of the program only resulted in a 5kg loss for a range of reasons but I’ve spent the last six or so months yo-yoing about that 5kg mark and not continuing to lose the next 20kg I need to lose.
My motivation has waned and my commitment floundered. Over the first few months of this year I fell into a bit of a hole – furious with myself and my inability to ‘diet’ and lose weight; but equally despairing of the concept of deprivation, which I feel the moment I restrict certain foods, count calories and so forth. As a former sufferer of an eating disorder it’s way too easy for me to become completely obsessed with food, my diet and my weight.
So, although I’m a long (long) way from where I need to be, I’m feeling hopeful about my not-dieting approach. Historically I’ve only ever dieted or binged. There’s been no middle ground. Until now.
To celebrate this new approach I’ve decided to host a blogging giveaway because I want to share some of my recent inspiration.
The first prize winner will receive a copy of Dr Kausman’s If Not Dieting, Then What? book (review available from my previous post) as well as his book, Calm Eating, which features Dr Kausman’s own words as well as quotes from clients and other writers.
In addition, the first prize winner and four runners’ up will receive the very-fabulous empowerment cards (valued at $25), comprising 64 business sized cards in a lovely little box – to use as you choose: turn one over each day, scatter them about your house to find when you most need them, or stick them in places you look every day. I bought some for myself and have put three next to my computer… though I plan to shuffle through the others on a regular basis – perhaps swapping those with ones I’m looking at each day.
These three cards are my favourites. At the moment anyway. I suspect that will change from time to time, depending on how I feel…. But at the moment these mean a lot to me because: I’m at the beginning of my journey; I need to trust myself AND my intuition, thinking and feelings more; and I’m such an overthinker I constantly exhaust myself overanalysing everything I (and others) say and do and I’m prone to take on others’ emotions and feel a sense a responsibility for their feelings as well as my own.
I’ve put some additional photographs on my Facebook page (in an unscrupulous attempt to get more ‘likers’); but to have a chance at winning one of these five prizes, all you need to do is leave a comment on this post. I’d love to know which card / saying you can most relate to and why. The cards are all viewable on the clip above.
I will draw the prizes out randomly (no pitting one response against another!) and the competition is open to everyone and anyone around the world, although you can only enter once (you can, of course, however leave additional comments if you want to reflect on others’ responses). The competition will close next Friday 25 May 2012!
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patricia
May 17, 2012i am doing my best to speak gently to my self – resonates highly with me. love your blog(s) they are really the only ones i read casue they resonate highly with me xxxxx
Debbish
May 17, 2012Awww Patricia, thank you. And yep… My self-talk is always nastier than it should be, but I’m trying to work on that.
Deb
min
May 17, 2012I am good enough just the way I am. That is the one that has the most meaning to me. I am so hard on myself. I often think I am lesser than others. I would like to be able to say that quote and mean it.
I never win anything but that doesn’t matter. I really enjoyed the slide show
Great post. Great idea. Thank you Deb x
Debbish
May 17, 2012Thanks Min. I’m hard on myself as well, so I understand why you chose that one!
Jennifer
May 17, 2012Love this post! Just found your blog and wanted to say that I can identify with this 100%. I’ve been on and off the weight loss wagon for years and only realized recently that getting to a healthy body weight doesn’t mean counting calories, restricting food or becoming obsessed with what I’m eating. I’m approaching it from an intuitive eating perspective and so far I’ve learnt so much about myself and my habits. Far more than any diet every taught me actually.
So glad to have found you, i’m looking forward to following.
Debbish
May 18, 2012Hi Jennifer and welcome! Obviously I’m on that same path now – although it’s a scary one. I’m a control freak, it’s strange that I can’t ‘trust myself’ to make the decisions that are best for my body, AND that I think that some externally imposed plan will be better!
Deb
KCLAnderson (Karen)
May 18, 2012I want to be a runner up!! 🙂
My favorite saying is: “A well-worn path doesn’t mean it’s the right track.” I’m a trail-blazer, damnit! 😉
Debbish
May 18, 2012Ha! Definitely!
Julia
May 18, 2012So many of the cards have great ideas and mantras to live by – I love the difference between ‘everyday food’ and ‘sometimes food.’ that is SO MUCH BETTER than ‘good’ and ‘bad.’ the card ‘small changes make a big difference’ also resonates with me. AND the one that is really resonating is the idea that we only have so much emotional energy to expend. that is what is going on with me now – working so hard on my dissertation, teaching, training, AND counting calories – it is too much. i wonder, can i “not diet” and still lose weight?
Debbish
May 18, 2012I love that saying too Julia and ‘think’ I wrote about that in the post when I first shared the slideshow. I’d tried to do the ‘eat what I want, when I want it’ thing but naturally chose all of my danger foods which I scoffed down without appreciating them at all. I was flailing about wondering if this ‘intuitive eating’/not-dieting malarkey was for me when the slideshow appeared and that slide in particular reminded me that I need to stop putting values on food. I think there’s another slide: All food is morally neutral – which I think is also a goodie cos I’m a big labeller! (Good, bad, evil etc)
Deb
Emma
May 18, 2012“I am no longer putting off my life until I reach a magic weight” – this one hits home for me.
I recently came across your blog through a dear friend of mine and I’m looking forward to following it. I have struggled with this diet/magic weight ideal for so many years now that I’m exhausted by it, and with it. The cards are beautiful and the book sounds inspiring. I now deal with guilt associated with food by trying to be a fit, strong runner who needs food for fuel, for life and for enjoyment.
Thank-you for sharing your experiences,
Emma 🙂
Debbish
May 18, 2012Hi Emma and welcome…. and this one is also a biggie for me. You’re right on many counts – we can’t put our lives off (I certainly have) and the cards and book are beautiful, so good luck!
And well done on your running!
Deb
Sacha
May 18, 2012I had to watch this twice because the first time I paid more attention to the song than the cards. (I love that song!) Anyway. I really liked several of them, but there are two similar cards that especially apply to me. “Weight doesn’t equal worth” and “I am good enough just as I am.” From a little girl, I have always thought myself less worthwhile because of my weight, often thinking I would be more popular or have this or that. Even today, I often don’t feel good enough, even when I know I’m very good – even excellent – at something.
Hang in there. I love the progress you are making with yourself. It’s very encouraging and inspiring. You rock!
Debbish
May 18, 2012I love the song as well! That probably gets me as teary as much as the sayings Sacha.
And thanks for your encouragement!
Deb
Satu
May 19, 2012Hi Debbie!
I liked the first slide and the one that talked about categorizing foods as “everyday” and “sometimes” foods. I like the idea of having some other way to categorize foods just than good or bad.
I hope you will learn not to struggle with eating and dieting and I hope that for myself too.. 🙂
Debbish
May 19, 2012Thanks Satu.
Liz@LastChanceTraining
May 19, 2012I like the “well worn path doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the right one” – so true in all aspects of life really xx
Debbish
May 20, 2012Very true Liz…
Rebecca
May 21, 2012Health and Vitality comes in all shapes and sizes is a great great mantra…love it!
Debbish
May 21, 2012True… a bit like the pictures in your latest post! Love them!
Julia
May 23, 2012Hi Debbie,
I have been following your blog for a few months now and take comfort in your honesty and genuine stories about your struggles and successes with your weight. It is good to know there are others out there that feel as I do sometimes. From the slideshow I watched, I liked the card “I have the power to say no”. A lot of the time I feel bullied in to eating rubbish because other people are serving it up and I really feel as though eating crap food is the norm for most people. Its a refreshing reminder to know that I can say “no”. Keep up the good work with your blog! 🙂
Debbish
May 23, 2012Hi Julia and thanks for commenting.
The ‘saying no’ is a good one isn’t it and probably relates to a lot more than eating, dieting, weightloss etc. (I’m not good at saying ‘no’ but then resent others and myself when I don’t!!!)
Deb
CiCi
May 25, 2012Ky favorite is ” It can be scary to trust our intuition, but it is almost always dangerous not to trust it.” I find the biggest hindrance in my struggles to reign in my eating and take charge of my life to be my conflict between trusting and doubting my intuition.
Debbish
May 25, 2012CiCi – I like that one as well – for the exact same reasons as you!!!
jules- big girl bombshell
May 25, 2012I have two….
It can be scary to trust our intuition but it can be dangerous not to
and
I have faith in my body…
Why those? Because I am finding the amazement in just how much my body protected and survived me! Time to listen to its wisdom!
Debbish
May 25, 2012Great response Jules. I often go on about how much I ‘hate’ my body and yet I wrote a blog post earlier this year after having watched a show (Castle) where someone was being cryogenically frozen (after their death). Apparently all they really needed was to keep the head cos they could generate a new body.
I was horrified (cos I toss around the idea of being cryogenically frozen – half-seriously!) and realised that…. while I rant and rave and complain about my body (and ostensibly hate it), I don’t think I’d want someone to give me a new one!!!
Deb
espresso maker
July 21, 2013Its like you read my mind! You seem to know so much about this, like you wrote the book in it or something.
I think that you can do with a few pics to drive the message home a little bit, but
instead of that, this is magnificent blog.
An excellent read. I’ll definitely be back.