Great expectations

Thursday, November 10, 2011 Permalink

Twitterers around the world will know that I haven’t reported on the outcome of this week’s weigh-in. On my weight loss program we weigh-in on a Wednesday (and it is now Thursday here in Oz). I already confessed to a 2+kg gain the previous week (which actually covered a fortnight). Rather than frighten me into motivated submission, I shrugged my shoulders at the gain (Meh!) and shovelled in bags of caramello koalas and packets of corn chips. All while off work ‘recovering’ from the loss of my father. Excuses, excuses. By the end of last weekend I’d personally reignited the local economy as I ploughed my way through frozen hot chips, chocolate and champagne.

I found far more appropriate illustrations, but this guy was just so cute I couldn't resist him...

When Monday dawned I bravely faced the scales and was relieved (?!) to see only a minor gain as a result of my ongoing transgressions. (Thank god I kept up some exercise!) After announcing that I was ‘back’ in the game I’ve yo-yoed about this week… with some wins and losses. Food-wise, I’ve been very good. My calorie levels (from food!) have been low. Despite having a busy week at work (my boss resigned, impacting on my tenure – it seems quite frankly – karma thought I didn’t have enough on my plate at the moment!) I’ve exercised every day, mixing it up a bit with an exercise bike interval session, lovely early evening walk and a pump (weights) class. Less-impressive has been my wine consumption (hey, a girl needs a crutch in her life… she can’t be expected to cope on exercise and long baths alone!) which I’ve supposedly counterbalanced by not eating carbohydrates at night.

Even though I’d only had a couple of days of ‘goodness’ (in a behavioural, not nourishment sense) I jumped on the scales Wednesday hoping to see them heading in the right direction. I’d been lying in bed reading everyone else’s weigh-in results via Twitter on my iPhone (as you do)… and hoped for some good news myself (pigs flying, Jesus statues bleeding and other miracles being equally possible). But alas… while there was some movement and it was in the right direction, it was barely enough to register. Hurrumph!

I know that some of my Saturday and Sunday calories were probably still settling by the time Monday and Tuesday came around, but naturally (!) I did expect to see a drop. A DECENT one.

euphoriaI realise I seriously need to lower my expectations. It’s funny because in many ways I expect so little of myself. And others. And yet… I suspect the precedence I set last round with great weight loss numbers meant that I went into this round expecting similar things. It hasn’t eventuated for a number of reasons – many of which I’ve previously written about. And, on top of that, each time I step onto the scales and am disappointed with the result, my motivation wanes even more. Even though I set a 10kg weight loss goal for this 12-week round, I seriously ‘expected’ it to be more. Given that I’m hovering around less than a third of that with less than a month to go, it appears I am going to fail in stellar style.

The double digits I’ve dreaming about even look like a pipe dream unless I achieve some movement on the scales soon. But perhaps it’s time to get back to basics. Despite previously being under 105kg until my recent waywardness, I will again make that my short term goal. I’m only a kilogram or so off, so it should be very doable. And then I’ll aim for 103kg. Small steps cos, after all…. one small step for man; (is) one giant leap for mankind.

12 Comments
  • Gabi Bruce
    November 10, 2011

    Hi Debbish,

    God I love your blog, it seriously makes me laugh every day and i look forward to the email in my inbox that tells me there’s been another post from you.

    PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE be a writer – tenure schmenure, can’t you be a writer full time? That’s one way to ensure you survive on nothing but fresh air…weightloss assured! But then sadly following that, extreme starvation and death, which would then deprive me of my daily dose of you…so actually scratch that, don’t die – maybe a part time grown up girl work and part time writing?! Because clearly you were born to be a writer, you were born a writer – so you should write! Lots and lots please.

    Thank you 🙂

    Gabsx

    • rockafellaskank
      November 10, 2011

      Gabi

      Thank you so much for you lovely compliment (I’m actually going to a publishing seminar tonight for feature writing – or something like that)…. In fact I like compliments about my writing as much (if not more than) about my weight!
      PS. Have considered the part-time writing, part-time working thing!

      Deb
      xx

  • mia madsen (@_Miss_Mia)
    November 10, 2011

    Excellent post Deb; I’m also at the point of re-assessing goals and deciding where to go from here, but as you said – small steps.

    PS cute guy above is Jenson Button (F1 driver) and I do believe him to be very cute!!

    • rockafellaskank
      November 10, 2011

      Thank you for letting me know the name I need to be putting to my fantasies.. Jenson (hmm… that’ll do!) Good luck with your goal setting!

      • Lindsay Lim
        November 16, 2011

        he is a hottie! and my favourite f1 driver! 🙂 hahahaha

        • rockafellaskank
          November 16, 2011

          I had no idea who he was…. ‘cept that he was cute!

  • J.
    November 10, 2011

    interviewings a heck of a lot more confident if you drop a few – maybe that can be your motivator when you need to stop yourself on the binges. And seriously – the regular alcohol is not helping – not just from the calories – it interrupts your normal metabolic burn of fat. it’s doubly daming.

    • rockafellaskank
      November 10, 2011

      J, you’re right. I do feel so much better facing off with a panel if I think I look okay. Have been binge-free this week and it’s just the alcohol I need to rein in now…. I had done so previously but recent events gave me the excuse to start. I had a few alcohol-free nights last week but only one this week so far (though tonight will be). Will need to make more of an effort!

  • Glamorous
    November 10, 2011

    Have you checked out the
    My Way Out website? It has really helped me;

    Have a look back at your pre-season reasons for wanting to do this, your goals, your excuses and the way you said you would handle it.

    Congratulate yourself on your successes and more importantly the huge break through you have made in staying on the 12 wbt. Go girl. x

    • rockafellaskank
      November 10, 2011

      Thanks – good idea to remind myself of WHY I am doing this! I re-read some old posts to try to motivate me this week and it did help a little, so I suspect going back further (even to pre-season tasks for my first round) would certainly help!

      Deb

  • Big Girl Bombshell (@BigGirlBombshel)
    November 10, 2011

    great post! getting back to the basics is always a good start and set mini goals that don’t depend on the scale….keep moving forward not up or down

    • rockafellaskank
      November 10, 2011

      Thanks. Scales down a smidge again today… will focus on the mini-goals!

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