Day 44

I called in at the grocery store on the way from work (to buy vanilla diet coke and onions) and picked up a lovely piece of fillet steak.  In my mind the fantasy ensued… fillet steak, nicely baked potatoes (some greens cos I ‘should’) and several glasses of cabernet sauvignon.  Of course that would entail the entire bottle and at least 7 Weight Watchers points in booze.

As I had only had less than 10 points during the day I mentally calculated what I could consume to take me to my 24 point allowance.  I decided IF I had to I could skip the potatoes and just have the steak, veges and wine. 

Then I remembered that NOT having the wine (ie. sufficient booze-free days) was as important for my health as losing the 40-odd kilograms I have to lose.  So then (of course) I felt deprived and (then) depressed at the night stretching ahead of me with no treats.

I was still contemplating my options when I arrived home.  After noticing I gained weight between Saturday and Monday, I again jumped on the scales today and I am back to (approximately) what I was on Saturday.  THANK GOD!  So… then I decided that I should stay motivated.  Sadly remembering how relieved and self-satisfied I was last week (when sticking to points and going booze-free) hasn’t been enough to focus me.

But stepping on the scales helped.  I decided I would try to convince myself I was having a treat, and skipped dinner (I had chicken stir-fry for lunch so my day hasn’t been ENTIRELY devoid of protein and veges) and had a popcorn feast instead.  I have butter on my popcorn – with some savoury flavouring… so that came to about 6 points and I had (what seems to have become my nightly habit) an egg custard. 

So, only 17.5 and 18 points yesterday and today (respectively) – going partway to making up for Sunday’s naughtiness I hope. 

I had my private pilates lesson this morning, so earned ‘bonus’ points as well (though I only ever counted / needed them if I was having wine!!!).  It is the first exercise I have done since my lesson last Friday.  I really must do more (some!!!) exercise – particularly some cardio.  That has to be my next goal!