Today at work, I was chatting to this colleague (I don’t know terribly well) and during a 10 minute conversation I pretty much covered everything from how I felt about myself and my body to the fact that I recently ‘realised’ I wouldn’t be having children; and how I felt about that. (ie. The fact that I had to find other meaning or purpose in my life.) Note that the conversation started with a work-related conversation and led to me talking about how much work shapes my life (cos I have so little else in my life etc etc) I didn’t just randomly dump on this poor woman I barely know!
And she said the nicest things. As you may know, I am prone to be somewhat hard on myself and she pulled me up on it constantly during our conversation. In fact she was shocked by my own expectations of myself. She said I was lovely and bright and bubbly etc and an amazing person. (Okay, I might have added that last bit, but she said the rest of it. And I know what you are thinking… she was hardly going to say, ‘Well you are a fat ugly bitch so what did you expect from your life?’ now was she?
Interestingly I discovered that she also likes writing (see, it wasn’t all about ME!) and is also trying to get pregnant with her partner. She also likes self-help type books, but not scarily so. In telling me to cut myself some slack, she quoted some author she likes. I can’t recall her words exactly but it was something like… You are unique and you are a better you than anyone else could be. Or something.
It reminded me of a quote in a journal that I received as a present from a friend a few years ago. That quote (by Shirley Briggs – no idea who that is and too lazy to google it) goes:
Let’s dare to be ourselves, for we do that better than anyone else can.
I have to admit I sometimes find quotes a bit wanky (if they aren’t from The Big Bang Theory, Deadwood or Buffy). But this book has a few nice ones scatters about its pages. Here is another similar quote by Louise Hay (Again, NFI who she is):
Remember: you are the only person who thinks in your mind! You are the power and authority in your world.
Words to live by. If one tries hard enough. Surely.