Book review: Tenderfoot by Toni Jordan

Tenderfoot by Toni Jordan was a mind-blowing read for me. As usual Jordan’s writing is amazing. I read her debut novel Addition after commencing writing-related courses and it was the first time I became conscious of prose and I marvelled at her genius. I felt the same way years later when I read The Fragments. Tenderfoot (for me) however offered so much more – a very nostalgic and rather emotive trip down memory lane. Andie, our narrator lives in Morningside in Brisbane – where I lived before making my seachange 12 years ago. Her mother is a barmaid at the Colmslie Pub – not my regular cos it was fairly dive-y but almost around the corner from my old apartment. It is themed around gambling (very specifically greyhound racing). My non-betting quite-religious mother worked in a TAB for most of her adult life. Part-time initially, before managing her own branch. I vividly recall the pre-computer days with coloured race sheets placed on the walls with scratchings scribbled out as the horses or greyhounds dropped out. I remember the cigarette stench of those who spent most of the day in there. Of mum’s stress when they moved to ‘computers’ with little cards to be shoved into giant boxes.

Brisbane, 1975: Andie Tanner's world is small but whole. Her mum is complicated, but she adores her dad and the kennel of racing greyhounds that live under their house. Andie is a serious girl with plans: finish school with her friends, then apprentice to her father until she can become a greyhound trainer, with dogs of her very own.

But real life rarely goes to plan, and the world is bigger and more complex than Andie could imagine. When she loses everything she cares about - her family, her friends, the dogs - it's up to Andie to reclaim her future. She will need all her wits to survive this new reality of secrets and half-truths, addictions and crime.

As this is set in the 1970s I also wistfully teared up at everything from playing ‘elastics’ to bindis and Christmas beetles in summer to Sunday night Countdown on television. SO. MANY. MEMORIES and Jordan does an amazing job in bringing them to life. It’s very much akin to Trent Dalton’s Boy Swallows Universe. Told in the present about a pivotal time in Andie’s past.

From my age now I can see all the different versions of myself lined up, the traits and beliefs and values that each iteration held and which ones they kept and which they discarded. Sometimes I think Andie at twelve was the original and each subsequent Andie was a photocopy of the one preceding her, and these copies faded and lost colour, blurring and softening over all these decades. 36%

Andie’s world is going swimmingly when we first meet her. She adores her father – a greyhound trainer – and their dogs. Her relationship with her mother Val is more fraught, and deteriorates after her father leaves. Because adult Andie is sharing this story it’s obvious she now realises much was wrong in her parents’ marriage but at the time she was oblivious and sure her father will return, or ask that she live with him. He does neither and as an adult reading this book it’s heartbreaking to see Andie’s hopes slowly fade.

My mother was making plans for a future without my father in it. In her mind, he was not coming back. I was shocked at her, at my own stupidity, at the way my life had become something unrecognisable without my noticing. 20%

Andie ponders on the events shared here being catalysts for change – both good and bad. And she wonders if it’s her father’s departure; her mother’s new relationship with Steve; (retrospectively) the unsuspecting support Andie gets from Steve; or the fact that she betrays him, that is the point of change or no-return. It’s a reminder that both good and bad can co-exist and sometimes it’s hard to see unexpected benefits or unintended consequences.

Maturity does not rise smoothly like water filling a tank. Instead our coming of age is a jerky, unpredictable process, a wild tide coming in on a ragged beach….

Some parts of this story mark me as astonishingly mature, while other parts reveal me as little better than a baby…

In truth we are many different people over the course of our lives, often unrecognisable to ourselves or others. We are entirely inconsistent. I try not to be too hard on myself. 82%

There’s so much to love about this book as Andie’s world changes; the life she’s depended on at home, her friendships, and the pastime she’d loved. And at times this is heartbreakingly bittersweet. Val is a challenging character to like but Jordan ensures she’s nuanced so you’re unable to find her all good or all bad. #mostly

My mother loved me. I have never doubted that. I have also never doubted that she never forgave me for what I did, not even on her deathbed….

I ruined everything or her love for her love for her only child, and she spent years balancing the thin line between these, sometimes slipping from one side to the other. 60%

I’ve procrastinated over this review because I cannot rave about this book enough. Jordan gives us a beautiful and enchanting tale delivered even more eloquently through her exquisite and insightful prose.

It becomes clear in those moments that childhood is as much a place as it is a time. 25%

Because I’m petty and prone to sulking, I usually refuse to buy real copies of books I only receive electronically for review, however I know this will bring many memories back for my mother (despite her Alzheimers) and my brother so I need to get a copy stat so they can also revisit our shared past.

Tenderfoot by Toni Jordan was published in Australia by Hachette.

I received an electronic copy of this book for review purposes.